Lëïzëë Pïggëë Phörs~*

I was woken up by the light. The curtain was not closed. I felt odd. Did I not closing it or... well, I just couldn't remember. I pulled myself out of bed and wondered why the house was so quiet. I went down and found no one. Everything to me seems to be just as the way they were yesterday. Well, beside, I was not woken up by any noise or anyone today. Obviously, sth had just gone wrong. Quiet, that's not what it had always been in this house. Anyway, I just didn't know how much wrong was it. So, I took the time and made myself breakfast. 'Hum... when did I last went in and actually do the cooking?', I asked myself when entering the kitchen. I didn't have an answer. Does it really matter? Nah... I got a bowl and pour a hip of chocolate cereal into it. Tell me you didn't expect me to really cook anything, did you? No answer. This feel exactly the same as it was before the six months passed. I am eating breakfast alone. I somehow smiled to myself. Such a great feeling!

'Wake up!!! You're late! late! late!', you screamed to my ear and started pulling the blanket out of me. 'Urgh... what is it this time?', I asked with my eyes closed. 'As promised, remember?', you announced and continue the bossy talk. 'Alright, alright, alright', I cut you off, 'I get it!'. What a wicked morning, I thought to myself. Why do I have to have not enough sleep? Why couldn't I just sleep till whatever time I wish. Why couldn't you be a little nicer? Why couldn't you just let me do stuff on my own? Why couldn't you just... before I could really open my eyes, everything went black.

I gasped and my eyes were wide open. You were sitting by the bed. 'I was about you wake you up', you spoke with a smile. 'Oh...', I said, 'you don't have to do that now', I returned the smile. 'Everthing is ready in the bathroom', you said. 'You have 30mns to get yourself ready', you added before you left the room. I took the glance at your departure. What if this is real? Having you gone for good. I'll be free from all obligation you said I am attached to. I'd be able to play my own routine. I'd be glad to have the day comes. I'd be throwing a big party for my freedom. I'd be... Well, I should shower now.

The door was opened and closed. I didn't hear a sound. You called for me. I didn't get a word. You left me a note. After washing the dish, I found the note and called you. 'Hey, I'm here now', I said. 'Where from?', you asked. 'You know, doing the dishes', I responded. Further I asked, 'Dinner yet?'. You replied, 'yeah' and asked, 'what are you doing?'. 'Talking to you', 'what do you suppose I'd be doing beside that?', I said with sacarsm and a smile. Being with you is all I dream of doing. Spending time with you and nothing else will get in a way. I cheered myself for being so lucky having you. 'I'm watching movie', you cut my thought short. 'Oh...', I was. I thought you were expecting my call. I thought talking to me was all you ever wanted to do. I thought being with me is all you cared. When seeing your note, I felt guilt of not being there the time you were. I blamed myself for having done so. But now, after I made the effort to call, you ended up telling me you are watching movie. Is it a suggestion that I should hang up the call? I don't get it. I went wild. After awhile I see that you are feeling down. I didn't even have a chance to know why. I started to feel useless being one important person in name but the reality is something else. I couldn't go further than to give you the time and stay quiet. 'Can we not talking now?', you asked. I wish to tell you that I don't wanna not talking now. I wanna hear what you feel. I wanna know what is that in your mind. I wanna comfort you. But no, there is no such a chance. I have to stay calm. I hope you would later tell me everything about it. But I doubt that is going to be a different one. I know you will tell me to forget it or you ended up lying you forget it already when I ask you to tell me. You gave me that smile and I will fall for that smile. I would end up not asking and things will be just like it used to be. The story will never be told, again.

A familiar little voice came through my ear. While trying to open my eyes, I rushed to the door. There you were smiling and acting like nothing had happened. Well, yeah, nothing had actually happened. 'Good morning!', you delightedly greeted me. 'Morning', I greeted you in return. 'Want some soup?', you asked. 'Sure', I shortly replied. You hurried to the kitchen and I went pulling a chair to have a seat. Sitting with my both hands supported my jaw, I looked at your cheerful expression on doing the job. I'm not sure if this is real or you are just pretending. I wish you are pretending and I wish you tell me that you are pretending. You returned with two bowls of soup. 'It's a little salty', you told me, 'But I know you like it that way'. You continued talking but I was not listening. My mind was drifted away somewhere else... 'So, what do you think?', you came back with question. 'What?', I blankly replied. You stared are me and said, 'You were not falling asleep while sitting, were you?!'. Oh no, I was not. I'm not deft. Every part of body still function so well. I just don't wanna directly denying your request. I thought I've told you, I don't like my stuff be borrowed. And this time, you are not asking permission. You are telling me that is a good deed everyone would do. What do you expect me to say? I, of course, could not deny. At the same time, I could not lie myself that it is OK too. 'Uh...', I made. 'Yeah,...', I hesitated and continue, 'You can have it and if you need help, count me in'. I faked a smile. 'Yes! I knew you would say that', you happily continue your speech. But I could not hear it again. I turned to think of how a life could be such a sorrow.

I closed the curtain and got myself into bed. Staring at the dawn light, I complainted to myself, 'You know, this is not the first time you are doing this'.

I am gone for another nightmare again. Six months was not enough, just yet.

It's bad not being able to witness the day of their life but it feels good being here to cherish their moment together hehe...

Congratulation to the loving couple Lim and Bang Kosal :D